I want to talk about how I feel
I really don't have any purpose for this post other than that I just want to talk about how I have been feeling lately, and maybe see if anyone here is like me.
I really don't have any purpose for this post other than that I just want to talk about how I have been feeling lately, and maybe see if anyone here is like me.
For ten years I have been stuck like a hamster on a wheel, in the same pattern, over and over again. How do I break it?
STEP ONE: I started with hope and excitement that my marriage could be fulfilling and with the confidence in myself to be the loving wife I want to be.
STEP TWO: After a period of time, onto frustration b/c I was working alone - not only could I not figure out and make him happy, but I got none of my needs met - I had to do everything, I had no partner in life like I dreamed of.
Does this seem par for the course for ADHD? Yesterday, I put my husband's garbage (fast food wrappers, old receipts) that he had left in the car onto the passenger seat, so that he would be sure to see it when he got in the car when I picked him up from his job. Well, mission not accomplished, because not only did he not seem to see the wrappers and receipts but also he sat on them and then left them on the seat when he got out of the car at home.
I kind of get "out of sight, out of mind," but "under butt, out of mind"?
I need some help. 5 years ago when I was first married I noticed things about my way of thinking and behavior that was detrimental to being in a healthy relationship so I sought out counseling by myself. I took a test with a psychologist and was told that I had adult ADHD. I thought he was a total moron; I was uneducated about ADD and ADHD I thought there was no possible way I could have ADHD. I graduated with high honors, was on the dean's list in college and am able to finish most (99.9%) of the things I start with no problems.
I see myself in so many posts here. I finally feel like I'm not alone....and maybe things are not THAT bad. Still, at the moment, I feel like I'm at the end of my rope; however, I know that it will pass...but not without lasting damage.
How can you tell if you're properly dosed, or is perhaps the medication isn't working as hoped?
I don't have time for the long post I want to write, but...
What do you guys know about emotional affairs? Anyone here have an experience with them?
Pb.
I'm new to posting here, although I was lucky to find this site almost a year ago. I guess I'm finally getting the courage to share my feelings and experience. I see I'm not alone in this. My husband has what I believe to be undiagnosed ADHD. He exhibits all of the symptoms and so many posts that I have read look like something that I would have posted myself, almost verbatim. I've been married for 6 years now and we have a beautiful little girl who is now 4. We dated for 8 years before getting married and everything was perfect. We never argued.
I am the non-ADHD spouse that recently gave up on my husband, who has diagnosed Adult ADHD and will not attend treatment or take medication. His condition has not helped my own anxiety. He often creates very uncomfortable situation for me in which I am on verge of increased anger on my end, frustration, emotional isolation, you name it.
It so happens that right now I have a terrible cold. My ADHD husband is acting like he usually does under these circumstances...he is punishing me for not being well. Does that sound strange, or have I found a forum where people will understand what I am trying to say? It is as if, by my inability to carry on and keep life as it should be,I have somehow done something unforgivable. He will remain aloof and unsympathetic and emotionally cool until such time as I straighten up and get back to normal.