Recent forum posts (all topics)

 

Hi

I am new here and this is my first post. I am the non-ADHD partner. My partner of one year is not diagnosed (and he has an aversion to most things in the realm of psychology that involves a diagnosis) but I have suspected for some time he has ADD. I am hoping that I might be able to get some insight by posting some information about our current situation as many of the posts I have read here have been really helpful and have felt like they are hitting really close to home.

 

Recently, I asked my husband if it appears to him that I move like lightning.  Meaning, is he ever in awe of how fast I take care of things, how fast I can clean a bathroom, how I can go to the grocery store and back in less than an hour with food for the week purchased? (not just a gallon of milk).  And he said YES!  This is not a hateful slam on him....it was just really nice to see that he sees me.  I can only imagine how frustrating it must be for him to not be able to do that.  I am really working on understanding it from his side.

We have come to a point (40 years of marriage) where we cannot talk to each other any more. I can barely look at him anymore. I look at him and see all the times he ignored me and hurt my feelings and manipulated me...maybe it was all unintentional but it still affects a person to be so un-valued and demeaned.  It is said we should NOT take other people's actions or even words personally.  I tried to do that on a daily basis for 40 years.  You know what happens when you stuff your real feelings and think you are strong enough to rationalize in neglectful, hurtful situations?

Hi,

I went home mid afternoon and had my first run in with the angry insulting and belittling wife I thought miraculously went away since I started treatment. In the middle of a very busy day she called to say that she was feeling overwhelmed and needed my support at home. So I wriggled out of some nonessential work tasks and went home. I did say that there was still some office work that needed to be done and asked her to be tolerant of phone calls, emails and other sudden needs to do work.

My spouse of 12 yrs ( known for 14 though) has ADHD.  He has that and Bipolar II and OCD.  Yes quite a powerful mix. I am not unscathed though I have Bipolar type A or I.  I seem to deal much easier with my illness, when he struggles even with medication.    Now on the whole he is nice guy, intelligent guy and he treats me well for the most part.

Hi everyone this is my first post here and I am seriously soooo excited to be here. I've been reading a lot of people's posts and oh my can I relate! My hubby was diagnosed with ADHD as a child and now years later I think it still really affects him. We've been married for almost 2 years with a 10 month old  and I am so about ready to throw in the towel. One of the main issues is money and his stupid, STUPID car..

So I have been talking with my counselor a BUNCH lately about the idea of acceptance.  After 20 years of being the responsible one while ADHD hubby gets to do pretty much whatever pleases him at the moment, I am negative and spent and exhausted-like many of us are.  But we cannot afford a divorce and we have two kids.  Right now my plan is to suck it up until the now 8th grader graduates from high school and then RUN as fast as I can.  In the meantime, my counselor has me working on getting to a place of acceptance.  I know this is best for me.

How many of us started off just wanting to love our spouses unconditionally? This is a good thing, but, I just didn't know all the different faces of Love...Nor did I know how to recognize fake spirits that showed pleasing attributes, and influenced me to say it's Love. My perception, was skewed because of my own neediness, and my own spiritual immaturity. 

Hello everyone, I am relatively new to this forum and definitely relatively newly accepting of the fact I have ADHD. To make a long story short I have been married for 15 years. Only in the last year or so have I accepted the ADHD tag and tried to do something about it. And for the first few months my efforts were pretty half hearted. I am now taking drugs...So my wife has been dealing with this for a while and had built up a lot of resentment and anger towards me. We have our first child now and he is an infant still.