Recent forum posts (all topics)

My wife whom I married about 5 months ago has ADHD.

Holy smokes, this is some of the hardest sh*t I've had to deal with in my 59 year life (and that's saying A LOT)

Growing up, I was taught to work hard, give to others and expect nothing in return. Having faulty, meaning any, expectations on others was shameful. Also, I was taught it was wrong to sacrifice for others. Becoming bitter was my responsibility to avoid, since it made a person unattractive. 

Come to think of it, my upbringing was full of contradictory rules for how to be a person or a woman.

Not long ago, I was having some frustration dealing with my sister who has been very insistent that I "be around people". Her query: "don't you want to be around people?" keeps repeatedly coming up. 

For me, this comes across as not taking no for an answer which it definitely has that flavor to it because it comes up almost everytime we talk.

How are your mornings? Do you prefer nice quiet mornings when you get up or do you wake up ready to take on the day talking, getting things done, listening to news, etc?

I like really quiet mornings. I love getting up by myself and leaving my husband in bed. I make coffee. I read. I go outside. I catch up on emails.

It appears most clinical psychologists in our area only treat children or up to age 22. Our therapist has recommended a psychologist to test/diagnose husband for possible ADHD. I have checked this website, CHADD, and several others. Does anyone have recommendations?

I do not believe my husband wishes to be medicated, so am going the psychologist route versus a psychiatrist.

Hi, I'm new here.   Recently discovered Melissa Orlov's book and it has been very enlightening.  I'm married for 11 years, and my husband has (I believe, especially after reading) undiagnosed/untreated inattentive ADHD.  When I broached the topic last week, after googling and realizing he has nearly all the symptoms, he was extremely dismissive, defensive.  He does not want to be evaluated or speak to any professional about it.  He does not have any mentor he trusts or respects or will listen to.

I think I've finally identified something that has had a detrimental impact on my well being throughout my life.  contained within, my personal relationships in my own family as well as love relationships throughout my life. 

I'm brand new to this site and forum.  Also, new to the whole adult ADD concept.  Thanks to the persistence of my fiancee, I have finally conceded that I have ADD after researching the topic and taking informal tests.  I/we have also been reading about how to live with the condition and work to modify behaviors.  My big challenges that are irritating her and stressing our relationship is my impulsiveness when speaking.  I tend to interrupt her frequently and I often speak in fragments before organizing my thoughts.  This makes my communication hard for her to follow.

It's been an interesting couple of weeks, after a major meltdown on my part a while ago, where it was clear that if I didn't draw boundaries for myself and stick to them, I was going to have a breakdown - I have gone into quiet, reflective mode. I'm just doing me, not pushing myself one iota beyond what I can comfortably do, concentrating on self-care activities, and focusing less on the ADHD problems in the household. Everyone seems calmer, and is indeed taking more responsibility where they can. Win.