Recent forum posts (all topics)

were do you start


I have just finished the first half of “marriage and adhd” and this first half has just described in detail my last 30 years of marriage every paragraph and were my relationship is at. I am also reading “ you mean I’m not lazy, crazy and stupid “and feel I have found what I have been feeling for most of my life. These came along on pbs show ” adhd and loving it” which for me was a light bulb going on.

I desparately need some support

I recently joined and only posted once. I can barely function between all the things that are going on with my ADHD spouse and lack of resposibiity and having to put our farm up for sale, surgury on daughter with Down's Syndrome who resides with us and is a sweetheart and  now he again needs surgury which after going thru many surguries he does not handle with much emotion other than anger and that being directed at me. I can't concentrate. As I'm typing this I'm wondering why try anymore. 13 years of a second marriage and it has just been a nitemare at times.

Understanding your non- ADHD spouse ?

I have recently found out that I have ADHD, Now to make a long story short I am deployed to Iraq and had some marriage problems, digging it out of my wife I found out she was thinking about leaving me when I returned, that she was not happy and has not been happy for a long time.  Doing some hard talking with her we both discovered ADHD and the effect it had on our marriage.  It was such a relief and now we both are wanting us to be together again but have hit some road blocks, let me explain and hopefully someone has gone though this and can lend a hand. 

 

I love him but I feel helpless and hopeless

My husband and I have been together for 6 years.  We got married last June.  Hes 26 and I’m 25.  He was diagnosed with ADHD before we met.  He told me about it in the beginning but I never really thought anything of it.  I thought it was just that he couldn’t hold still and always had to have the t.v. on, etc.  I had no idea how much it impacted his life nor did I ever look into what it really was.  Last December he asked me for a divorce.  We had been fighting pretty heavily for the previous two months.

double trouble: ADHD couples

Judging by the posts about the non ADHD partners, it would seem that a relationship that consisted of 2 adults with ADHD would be a chaos ridden battleground, not to mention what happens when little ADHD people come along. My spouse and I have endured each others faults and foibles for over 20 years, 17 of which were undiagnosed. Maybe it is easier to forgive your partner when you recognize your own faults, especially when those faults are echoed in the other. We discovered that the diagnosis was key in improving our quality of life.

How about when you ARE the person w/ ADD & you have managed to run a household & be an effective member of the family?

Hi everyone, i guess i get so frustrated by the description of the ADD person.  They are incapable of finishing anything, they are unreliable and they are a burden on the non ADD spouse. I have ADD and am classic about the highs of life thing. I am however, raising 3 girls, I started a Green Team in our town (including a website), I am on the Board of a local sports organization and have 2 other jobs that needed to be fixed. I am helping to improve some youth issues in towns. When people have issues, they come to me b/c they know I know how to fix it.

Finding Ways to Cope

So, a few days ago, I had (what I think is) a great idea. My main way of coping with my husband and his ADHD is by ranting. Unfortunately, my friends and family, who don't really understand ADHD at -all-, tend to start disliking my husband because of the things I complain about. They think he's really inconsiderate and rude, etc. So instead of ranting to them, I started an online blog today so that I could share my husband's antics with other ADHD spouses and maybe get a little feedback and/or understanding without the condemnation to my husband.

Addiction to ADHD meds

M husband was diagnosed about a year ago and was prescribed Adderall for his ADHD.  It really did make a difference, but he has been struggling with the addictive nature of the medicine.  I've found out tonight he has been abusing it for the past months.  Feel like 4 steps forward, 20 backward.  Does anyone else know anything about this and what did you do?  I mean if its a syndrome and helps, is that just a side note that it's addictive?  Help!  I am shocked and really disappointed right now.  Thanks.
 

Re: keeping it all inside

My ADHD husband has told me, "I keep things inside me, even though I'm really upset about something, but you have a harder time doing that". This doesn't make sense to me, because I believe that open communication is the key to a good relationship,  not "keeping it all inside". I don't nag or yell at him about things, I've  never been a nag, because I don't like that, but he REALLY has a hard time when I want to openly discuss something. He can talk for hours on lots of other things, but when it comes to US, he totally clams up. I don't understand.

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