Recent Comments

  • by: Joana Beatriz - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    Meu marido possui esse TDAH e a frequência de sexo é a cada três meses e olhe lá. Temos dois filhos. Me sinto desprezada e com baixa alto estima. POrtanto, isso da brecha para pensar em fazer sexo com outro homem... Descobrir recentemente isso, ele tá nem aí para nada... temos 7 anos de casamento ainda... Sou bonita, mas parece que não sou suficiente. Parece que estou forçando algo com ele. É um tormento, no primeiro ou foi no segundo ano de casamento, ele me confessou que era viciado em pornografia... até...
    >>> on Blog entry - 9 Reasons Porn Hurts

  • by: SamBamiteko_ (not verified) - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    thankyou   
    >>> on Blog entry - Finding the Right Partner When You Have ADHD

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    This is an interesting read. https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-marriage-statistics-personal-stories/#:....
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: adhd32 - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    Melissa, I wonder if you would be willing to share the approximate percentage of couples who seek your help and actually turn things around. What do you advise when the ADHD partner either doesn't want to seek help or only appeases their partner and half-heartedly participates because things have gone off the rails and their lifestyle is about to change.  I realize there are better outcomes if the ADHD person is enthusiastic about working on the relationship.  It seems that many of us here are not with...
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: MelissaOrlov - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    Yes, I agree that many with ADHD can have a healthy relationship, particularly if they address ADHD-related issues they bring to the relationship that are causing issues.  The divorce rate is high for a whole lot of reasons, though, not just because a partner gives up instantly.  Often (though this may not be the case in your own relationship) the non-ADHD partner has been waiting quite a long time and things have gotten quite bad before the ADHD person finds out about the ADHD...so that's far from '...
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: MelissaOrlov - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    I am hearing that this article offended some without ADHD who have read it.  I wonder if it would have been as offensive if I had suggested what sort of ADHD partner would be good for someone without ADHD.  In that article I might have said things like "a person whose ADHD brings them the creativity to succeed in the workplace (i.e. hold a job); a person who is willing to engage in working on issues without taking over; a person who shares your values and passions; a person who is empathetic and...
    >>> on Blog entry - Finding the Right Partner When You Have ADHD

  • by: MelissaOrlov - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    There are many things that can change, though it takes two people to make those changes.  And there are a few things that cannot.  The place to start with this is with education about what is going on.  The broken promises are often related to unmanaged ADHD symptoms.  The partner really wants to do something that they have agreed to, only to then have a symptom that shows up that leads to any of these - forgetting about the promise; putting it off until it's too late; doing part of the project but not...
    >>> on Forum topic - New and losing hope

  • by: SJC2021 - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    Never give up. Rule number 1. Don't blame her deficiencies on you. Her ADHD is hers alone. It will drive you insane, make you question your decisions, and they don't care. They literally cannot care based on their brain . Get away from her asap. Take the kids. File for sole custody and make her earn her time with them, because she probably isn't going to pay much attention to them in her world sadly. Being with someone who has ADHD is lonely and suffocating. Been there.  You will be amazed at how good...
    >>> on Forum topic - need to vent and support

  • by: sickandtired - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    You are spending too much of your efforts trying to point fingers at others rather than learn from this site. You said yourself that you came on here to learn how neurotypicals felt, but then you argue with us and accuse us when we honestly tell you how we feel. I know you must not want to hear it, but we are speaking our truth. I’m not going to tell you to get off of this forum because you don’t belong, like you told SCJ.  He has every right to be here. Like I said before, you need to look at yourself,...
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: SJC2021 - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    You've tried for 20 years. How's that going for you ?  Sorry to be an ass but tough love is required here.  He will NEVER change, NEVER  appreciate you, and you will NEVER get the real love and affection from him. But you know this.  Please help yourself. Life is short. You will be amazed at how great it can be without him dragging you down.
    >>> on Forum topic - New and losing hope

  • by: SamBamiteko_ (not verified) - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    Trust me Im not minimize you guys because Im still getting treated bad my dad who has undiagnosed ADHD and no treatment,I came on this website to see how neuroypicals are feeling and not trying to treat my partner bad ,but your saying that all ADHD are bad people escpially the ones who are getting treatment and working their who lives to be like neurotypicals like me.Oh and Im look at my myself everyday.I just don't like how your saying that ALL ADHD people are the same because were not some are...
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: sickandtired - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    i tried for almost 12 years to help my adhd ex, and the only changing he did was for the worse. I made myself literally sick trying to clear the way for him, but he never tried. When I was sick with asthma and arthritis and pure exhaustion doing Everything, and paying for EVERYTHING, one day he wanted to walk our 6 dogs he had collected, and I said no I don’t feel like it, he angrily said “You kill all of the joy”.  How do you think that made me feel???? There are folks on here that have “waited” as you...
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: SamBamiteko_ (not verified) - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    I also looked at your comment history and all you do is bash on people with ADHD saying that we are the worst people to be married to.So why are you still on this website than you don't help people at all.Like saying we can never be in a "normal relationship" or be "normal people"You exwife  had ADHD so why are you still here she your ex,this website is for people in current relationships or marriages.Stop using your own experiences on people with ADHD.
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: SamBamiteko_ (not verified) - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    Yea I get what your saying but when your saying the people who have been on meds and therapy for the whole life can't have a normal relationship is crazy.There are a lot of succesful people out there with adhd who have normal lives just like neurotypicals.The reason why divorce rates is so high too because the normals spouse can't wait for the husband to change,the give up instantly.
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: SJC2021 - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    (this post has been edited) I get the info from everywhere. Have you seen the divorce rate for people with ADHD ? It's astronomical. Do some research.  There is a reason the author of this website tells people dating someone with ADHD to WAIT THREE YEARS MINIMUM before marrying them.  Most adults who are diagnosed late in life have become accustomed to doing things their way. They rarely change, and even normals fall under this umbrella.  Getting an adult to admit they have a problem with their brain,...
    >>> on Forum topic - Anger & Sex/Intimacy - ADHD Husband

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    I agree with Melody and Sickandtired. There is no excuse for abuse.  I was in an abusive marriage for 17 years.  I finally got the courage or whatever you'd call it--a kick in the butt to leave him.  I was 46 years old and we had two children.  It was the hardest thing I've ever done, but ultimately, I left for my sanity and to set a good example for our children.  
    >>> on Forum topic - Help and heal broken relationship

  • by: sickandtired - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    He is using your kind, loving nature to control you for his own selfish needs. You are telling us all of these excuses why he did what he did, but these are not good enough reasons, because he is abusive and controlling. Your decision to take the vaccine is YOUR business. I commend the way you took it for the love of your grandma. She is worth it, but he isn’t. If some guy I had been dating for only 8 months was angry at me for doing something for my grandma, my mom, or my children, I would tell him to...
    >>> on Forum topic - Help and heal broken relationship

  • by: ESZTER - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    Hi, 1Melody1,  Thank you for your kind words. I think the same you do, nonetheless, I also want to put this into perspective: he lost his father because of the pandemic, meaning: government closed the nursery home and they sent his father home. After that he was taken to hospital, but he could not make it (he died by a stroke, not COVID). Now, he tried to find answers to that and he thinks this was all a result of the pandemic and also how the government handled it. He went into really dark theories and...
    >>> on Forum topic - Help and heal broken relationship

  • by: 1Melody1 - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    From this post, you sound like a very kind-hearted person. Unfortunately, this person prioritized his personal beliefs about a vaccine higher than he prioritized his relationship with you. I think that kind of says it all... it's madness that he broke up with you because YOU made a (smart and conscientious) decision for YOUR body alone. In his words, he expected you to prioritize HIS comfort over your own. RED FLAG!!! The temper explosion is also a red flag. The mind games you describe after are also a red...
    >>> on Forum topic - Help and heal broken relationship

  • by: ESZTER - 4 months 3 weeks ago
    Hi, adhdh32,    Thank you for your answer. Well, the way I see it is that even if we seemingly cannot work together (and I say seemingly because I do not usually give up on people, at least, not at the first attempt).  And also I feel there are certain things he cannot be in control of, such us emotional responses or a stressful situation. I might be wrong as I am not an expert but I also think when someone refuses things so deeply and aggressively, there might be something deeper there. (I know in this...
    >>> on Forum topic - Help and heal broken relationship

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