Recent Comments

  • by: c ur self - 22 hours 2 min ago
    Hopefully you can find them when searching....I got on the biggest one (most people) for a while...It wasn't for me....To many excuses being thrown around...But then again, I may not can understand that level of distraction.... Hope you find it...
    >>> on Forum topic - Facebook group for ADHD spouses/parents?

  • by: c ur self - 22 hours 11 min ago
    Caring devoted spouses adapt....But, much of that can be unhealthy....Because we can't cope with, or think for them, we fill in the holes...Then over time we start suffering the consequences of our actions....The reason melody and I and so many more understand you so well is, we live or have lived much the same way...We adapted and filled in the holes trying to make sense of life (keep it together)....If you ask us, was it imperative that we step in and fill these holes, most of us would say, Yes, without...
    >>> on Forum topic - ADD and now diabetic

  • by: 1Melody1 - 23 hours 30 min ago
    Non-ADHD Partner: r/ADHD_partners  - Great group that to your point, is not just all venting. They have a separate vent thread for those who want to just blow off steam and so most of the posts on the main page are genuinely asking for advice. A lot of ADHD folks post here to lend their perspectives too. ADHD Partner: r/ADHD  - You're right - this is for ADHD in general, but they seem to touch on relationships often. A lot of talk about medications and symptoms and I would say most or all symptoms impact...
    >>> on Forum topic - Facebook group for ADHD spouses/parents?

  • by: 1Melody1 - 23 hours 41 min ago
    I know just what you mean. It is so hard to stand back. My instinct was always to swoop in, but I wore myself out doing it (been with my partner about as long as you have been with yours). Now I feel good about the few things I can step back from. I don't help him find the many daily lost/misplaced items, for instance. Huge relief for me and he is accountable all on his own. I wish I could step back more but so much of what he does impacts the entire family. I hear you on the exploding head!!
    >>> on Forum topic - ADD and now diabetic

  • by: KeriC - 1 day 58 min ago
    I started having anxiety issues about 3-4 years into our marriage. I have chronic dreams that some emergency is happening and my husband can not be found. He is supposed to be somewhere but isn't. So I am going to have to learn to step away- I have been working on doing that but it's not always easy. It's not how I want it to be- but I've come to terms that it never will be. 
    >>> on Forum topic - ADD and now diabetic

  • by: KeriC - 1 day 1 hour ago
    This is something I have really been working on. Separating myself from his issues and letting things play out. It's hard, bc for 23 years I have parented and rescued him. But I can do it. I am going to have to for my own sanity. 
    >>> on Forum topic - ADD and now diabetic

  • by: KeriC - 1 day 1 hour ago
    I know you are so right but it's so hard to step back and stop being the rescuer. Not only am I his wife but I'm a medical person (NP) so it seems doubly hard. But this is something I have started working on in several areas- just distancing myself from issues related to his ADHD. I am going to have to or my head is going to explode! Lol
    >>> on Forum topic - ADD and now diabetic

  • by: mbuchanan - 1 day 6 hours ago
    Thanks! I'd prefer facebook because that's what I'm used to, but I could try to get more into reddit. Do you know the name of the sub for ADHD partners? I can only find one for ADHD in general and one for non-ADHD partners specifically.  General ADHD info is good but it's only since I've had kids that this has really become a problem for me and I've sought help. I mean truthfully looking in retrospect it's always been a problem for me from elementary school to college to interpersonal relations and...
    >>> on Forum topic - Facebook group for ADHD spouses/parents?

  • by: c ur self - 1 day 9 hours ago
    Hi Keri....I agree w/ melody, it's NOT ur responsibility.....We are our diets in many ways, and you, me, our spouses and every adult living can choose what, and how much to eat or drink..(If we are blessed to afford it)....You like many of us may watch someone we love destroy themselves more quickly than natural decline would take them...Do you know what speeds poor health worse than, or just as bad as poor diet?? I bet you said Yes, stress and anxiety....Your right....Take care of yourself, be a good...
    >>> on Forum topic - ADD and now diabetic

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 1 day 10 hours ago
    KeriC, My fiance had a heart attack in February.  He has been mostly vigilant about what he eats ever since they put stents in, to unblock two arteries.  His Cardiologist told him he needs to exercise and lose weight, and stop smoking weed. He has lost some weight, started riding his bike around town, takes all of his medication and monitors his blood pressure and OSAT daily. (Oxygen saturation).  He has not stopped smoking.  The day of his heart attack, he had a coughing fit, and was spitting up blood...
    >>> on Forum topic - ADD and now diabetic

  • by: 1Melody1 - 1 day 22 hours ago
    My husband also has Type 2 diabetes. For the first year he hyperfocused on it and cut out any food that would be considered bad. It was amazing and he lost a ton of weight and virtually cured his diabetes with diet. I was so impressed and proud of him. And then one day he just stopped caring. He eats a whole pint of ice cream at time, bags of chips, candy bars, etc. Daily. It is of course up to you how much you get involved, but personally, I could not add this to my already overflowing plate. I can't be...
    >>> on Forum topic - ADD and now diabetic

  • by: c ur self - 2 days 9 hours ago
    When we are married to a person who has a mind that consumes them, there is no room for the mental investment (work) that a mutual (healthy attachment) relationship takes.....These web sites, and the posts we write when we are married to people w/ that type mind, exists so we can communicate with people who understand....Bless you, I understand <3 c
    >>> on Forum topic - ADHD Spouse Asked for Divorce

  • by: 1Melody1 - 2 days 23 hours ago
    There are some excellent groups on Reddit - one for non partners and one for those with ADHD. There is frequent activity on both. I think there is also one for parents of ADHD children and one for women with ADHD.
    >>> on Forum topic - Facebook group for ADHD spouses/parents?

  • by: Mandg1977 - 3 days 28 min ago
    what did you do?
    >>> on Forum topic - Feel like my husband is financially ruining me.

  • by: VSH - 4 days 19 hours ago
    Bought the book on google books yesterday. Started reading. Im flabbergasted. Alot of the pieces are falling into place.  My H wont talk much about his childhood. Ive been looking for "excuses" there. He makes out all the time that im imagining things. He is never angry, hes never in a bad mood. So im the crazy one. One time he accused me of recording our conversation even though i didnt. And he says im crazy. Thankyou so much for the book tip. 
    >>> on Forum topic - confusion

  • by: Heethin - 4 days 22 hours ago
    Good to know! Thanks!
    >>> on Forum topic - My experience with stimulant meds including Acne..!

  • by: Heethin - 4 days 22 hours ago
    Im 47 have been on Adderal and it didn't do much, I was still scattered. My appetite didn't suffer though. I've taken concerts and now I'm on Vyvanse and I think my skin issues started with adderal. I have had clear skin most of my adult life like but the issue continued with vyvanse. I'm also focused on clogged pores and I'm breaking out on my chin, jawbone, cheeks, hairline etc and I too had the bumps on my scalp with Addreall I believe. It's not pleasant and it hurts! I'm going to make an appointment...
    >>> on Forum topic - My experience with stimulant meds including Acne..!

  • by: Will It Get Better - 5 days 16 min ago
    '... I also know that I don't want to waste my life fixing someone else's.' You may have accepted that, no matter what YOU do, there is no 'fixing' possible.  God bless you and may the removal of the constant chaos provide you a positive way forward.
    >>> on Forum topic - My Walkaway Movement

  • by: Lowered_expectations - 5 days 5 hours ago
    Thank you for what you wrote about it being the best decision you ever made. My ADHD spouse wants a divorce. I'm uncertain about the future, but one thing I always thought was that if I got divorced, my life wouldn't really be that different. My expenses would be about the same (maybe just a little more), I would still be doing the bulk of the childcare and housework, I still wouldn't be having sex (my choice - at least this way I won't even have to do it out of obligation) and I would still be the...
    >>> on Forum topic - My Walkaway Movement

  • by: Lowered_expectations - 5 days 6 hours ago
    Thank you so much! This was honestly just what I needed to hear. You're right. I helped because I am a helpful person. And this relationship taught me a whole lot about setting boundaries. I really appreciate this spin. It helped me a lot.
    >>> on Forum topic - ADHD Spouse Asked for Divorce

Pages