Recent Comments

  • by: Angeloflight - 4 hours 27 min ago
    Yes, thankyou for your comment and understanding, if he wanted to work things out and willing to, it would be different. After trying to communicate and connect with him so many times, to seek support and seeking support for us to no avail, it felt as though I was the only one believing in us. If he didn’t want to, I tried my best. I wish you all love and kindness. 
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: Lolkje - 14 hours 34 min ago
    So sorry to hear you're going through this. The uncertainty about the future can be overwhelming. Try to figure out where you must draw a boundary around yourself for your own sanity. We are fortunate that my 47 yo husband's ADD is mild. His medication helps quite a bit, and he is honest about his struggles. But I draw a line when he asks me to remind him to brush his teeth. I'm not his mother. With the pandemic, our 9 yo daughter's ADHD has been exposed, and she has some terrible days. His medication is...
    >>> on Forum topic - Where is the Thriving, or Recovery from ADHD?

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 1 day 10 hours ago
    SamBamiteko, I know there  are two sides to every story, and we are only hearing things from Butterflygirl's point of view.  In reading her post, I don't see where she is trying to "turn" her boyfriend into a neurotypical. While it is a positive thing that her boyfriend accepts his ADD diagnosis, and is on medication that he takes regularly, there is more to managing any condition than just popping a pill and calling it good. Sounds like any time she tries to have a discussion with him about anything,...
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 1 day 11 hours ago
    Sounds like your experiences have not been good ones.  No need to paint all neurotypicals with a broad brush.  I accept my fiance as he is.  That does not mean that we always get along perfectly.  In our 6 years together, we have had our ups and downs.  The one thing our relationship has that Butterflygirl's does not is that we communicate well.  I don't feel alone or isolated in my relationship.  My fiance does not use his ADHD as an excuse to behave badly or treat me like crap.  When he is wrong, he...
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 1 day 12 hours ago
    No need for that language.
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: SamBamiteko_ - 1 day 14 hours ago
    is this your adivce for someone in a marriage to someone with adhd if its thats horrible 
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: Will It Get Better - 1 day 15 hours ago
    Your last posts speak volumes (though I doubt those volumes are what you hoped.)
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: SamBamiteko_ - 1 day 16 hours ago
    adhd people cannot be their true self around you fucking NT we always have to mask around you people to make yall happy so fuck you 
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: SamBamiteko_ - 1 day 16 hours ago
    fuck you and Im gone for this sub you dont what is like to have fucking adhd everyday of your life so kill yourself and leave your boyfriend asshole 
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: SamBamiteko_ - 1 day 16 hours ago
    pls breakup with him pls your getting mad for him for having adhd your right he never know what is like to have it im sick of you NT getting mad at their fucking partners for not functiong like you so fuck your you are a bitch 
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: SamBamiteko_ - 1 day 16 hours ago
    sorry but he has adhd and your not trying to accomadate to him your trying to push him to function like a NT not a adhd person so I think he deserves better 
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 1 day 18 hours ago
    I know your post is 5 years old I just read it. Based on what you described your relationship, I'm wondering how you are doing now. I would never tell someone to leave their partner but in your case I think that is the only thing you could do. The best thing to do is to leave while you still have so much of your life ahead of you, versus doing what I did.. You shouldn't have to bottle up your feelings and "stuff it". That's not healthy and you are certainly not in a healthy relationship. Why does he get...
    >>> on Blog entry - For Men with ADHD Who Aren't Convinced it Matters

  • by: jennalemone - 2 days 6 hours ago
    :-)
    >>> on Forum topic - Am I Being Gaslighted?

  • by: Mizeeyore - 2 days 9 hours ago
    People with and without ADD / ADHD need a partnership.  Think about the difference between equality and equity. Do your part for equity.    
    >>> on Forum topic - Non-ADHD partner "does not need treatment"

  • by: goldenchild321 - 2 days 10 hours ago
    My ex has adhd and rsd and I experienced some of the same things.  Maybe try turning off all possible distractions.  Focus on having fun together sexually.  The other stuff I can't really comment on - I'm still on here occasionally to learn because our relationship ended and all of the things I experienced confused me soo much. Another question I would ask is he working to manage his adhd rsd?  This site has some interesting stories as well as how to adhd on YouTube.  I hope it works out for you!  
    >>> on Forum topic - Distracted and taking it personally

  • by: Mizeeyore - 2 days 10 hours ago
    Just attribute distraction during sex to add?  And not take it personally?  Think I'll test that theory by walking out of the room next time he gets distracted. Would he take it personally? Seriously, how do I NOT take that personally? I really need help with this.
    >>> on Blog entry - Distracted during sex?

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 2 days 16 hours ago
    Hi Luna, Here is the definition of gaslighting. manipulate (someone) by psychological means into questioning their own sanity. It doesn't sound like your partner is doing that. My ex-husband used to do it to me, so I have some experience with this. It sounds like you are coming from two different points of view. When you say that there were some good parts to the vacation and he doesn't see anything good about it at all, that may just be about perception.  
    >>> on Forum topic - Am I Being Gaslighted?

  • by: TryingToMakeItWork - 3 days 4 hours ago
    It's possible you're being gaslit, but your description of your trip and your different perspectives on it remind me of many trips my (ADHD) partner and I (non) have taken over the years. He and I have finally figured out some of what caused our major challenges around trips, and made some progress. 1) He hates planning, so I usually end up doing it if I want to go on a trip and not just "wing it" on everything from transit to lodging. But then if anything during "my trip" goes sideways, I feel...
    >>> on Forum topic - Am I Being Gaslighted?

  • by: Shaky1 - 3 days 8 hours ago
    Hello Suzanne. I'm sorry that my post struck a nerve. There is some very good advice on this board and I highly recommend that you do some reading of both Melissa's posts and those of others with good insight. However be aware sometimes reading too much can sink you into deep despair. I found myself so low as I read about what felt like an inevitable doom to my marriage. So keep it balanced, reading what helps you, not depresses you. I searched C Urself's posts and found a lot of help there. I'm trying to...
    >>> on Forum topic - A New Marriage Reckoning

  • by: 1Melody1 - 3 days 12 hours ago
    I can relate to almost everything in your post. I was with my ADHD husband for 20+ years. I just left this year with a teen-aged daughter.  You mentioned you no longer have hope the situation will improve. I felt the same way. As long as the ADHD partner remains unwilling to change or unable to see the impact of the ADHD on the relationship, there is only so much the non-ADHD spouse can do. The situation will not magically get better - our ADHD spouses are often perfectly happy with exactly how things are...
    >>> on Forum topic - A New Marriage Reckoning

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