Hiding Behind a Wall?
ADHD & Marriage News - February 10, 2026
Quote of the Week
“Before I built a wall I’d ask to know what I was walling in or walling out."
- Robert Frost
Hiding Behind a Wall?
A human response to pain is to retreat or build a wall around oneself. While walls can be helpful for short-term protection, they are often problematic for couples. Because except in a few specific instances (such as physical abuse) when a couple struggles it is the result of what BOTH partners are contributing to the relationship. In ADHD-impacted relationships the most common combination is one partner is contributing under-managed ADHD symptoms and chaos; the other partner is being overly controlling and angry in response.
But if you just wall off the anger, the ADHD symptoms don’t usually get managed better.
Relationships – and particularly FIXING relationships – are about ‘two’ not ‘one.’ In order to fix them it is best to not build a wall, but seek ways to constructively engage, instead.
Are you hiding behind a wall right now?
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Spring 2026 Seminar
Melissa's life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar has helped hundreds of couples 'do better' Starts Mar 25 / 9 Sessions / 8-9:45pm EST. Recordings will be available in case you miss a session or want to review the material. There is also a self-study seminar option available.
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
Understand how ADHD impacts emotional connections, communication, and day-to-day relationship dynamics. Each Zoom session focuses on topics chosen by group members for in-depth exploration and actionable strategies.
Join a community exploring similar issues, learn from each other's successes & struggles and find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Couples Support Group - Couples in Connection
Join Molly Schoenhoff and Jason Weber — partners in both life and work, and an ADHD couple themselves — for a unique, small-group experience designed for 5 couples ready to grow together.
Valentine's Day is around the corner!
It is one of those holidays that can bedevil couples impacted by ADHD, as ADHD partners often forget to do something special for their partner. If you have ADHD, read Melissa's suggestions.
Free Webinar with Melissa: Is Resentment Poisoning Your Relationship? Root Out Its Source, Move Forward: Watch here.
"Tackling Resentment in ADHD Impacted Relationships" February 28, 2026, 12 - 1:00 PMI - Melissa's presentation at ADHD ICONnect.
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here!
- Office Hours. LIVE Zoom sessions to ask your questions
- Weekly Action Tips. Emails with video coaching & short assignments
- Workshops: Live, expert-led workshops tailored to support your journey
- Book Club. Wisdom and support from ADHD experts and authors
- Community Discussion Forum. Expert-facilitated member discussion forum
- Unlimited Video Replays. Events are recorded for replay
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - (Expected Fall 2026) This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Registration Open) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
Be Who You Wish To Be
ADHD & Marriage News - February 3, 2026
Quote of the Week
“I felt very strongly I was not going to be defined by what someone else deemed appropriate"
- Megyn Kelly
Be Who You Wish To Be
One of the awful things about ADHD – you spend a lot of time with others trying to define you – either your ADHD symptoms (which can inhibit your choices) or partners, friends and more who suggest you should behave in certain ways.
Here’s an aspect of treating ADHD that we rarely talk about – good ADHD treatment opens the doors for you to be you. For example, if you need to stay engaged in an important conversation or with a task at work you can do so if you have good treatment in place. Before treatment you were ‘victim’ to whatever your ADHD brain might tolerate, and staying engaged was much harder…perhaps impossible.
With those additional options you are able to make choices that better reflect who you wish to be as a person. That means you get to define who you are, rather than have your ADHD define you. You can move through the world with greater confidence in your ability to follow through on decisions and choices.
When people with ADHD ask me whether treatment will change them I usually say “I hope so! I hope that it will allow you to be exactly who you wish to be, without the chaos.” With good treatment you can still be silly, or creative, or fun, or even chaotic. But you can also be more attentive, organized, etc.
Don’t let the ‘other’ of ADHD define you. Optimize your treatment for ADHD.
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Spring 2026 Seminar
Our life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar has helped hundreds of couples 'do better' Starts Mar 25 / 9 Sessions / 8-9:45pm EST. Recordings will be available in case you miss a session or want to review the material. There is also a self-study seminar option available.
Upcoming Support Groups
Registration will open for upcoming Support Groups on Thursday, Feb 5th at 6:00pm EST. You can view the groups now on this page.
Free Webinar with Melissa: Is Resentment Poisoning Your Relationship? Root Out Its Source, Move Forward: Watch here.
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here!
- Office Hours. LIVE Zoom sessions to ask your questions
- Weekly Action Tips. Emails with video coaching & short assignments
- Workshops: Live, expert-led workshops tailored to support your journey
- Book Club. Wisdom and support from ADHD experts and authors
- Community Discussion Forum. Expert-facilitated member discussion forum
- Unlimited Video Replays. Events are recorded for replay
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Opens Feb 5) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - (Registration Opens Feb 5) This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Registration Opens Feb 5) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
A Safe Place to Make Mistakes
ADHD & Marriage News - January 27, 2026
Quote of the Week
“An experiment by Tali Sharot, a neuroscientist at University College London, and colleagues showed how the brain becomes inured to the stress or emotional discomfort that happens when we lie, making it easier to tell the next fib…the team found that the amygdala’s response to lies got progressively weaker with each lie…"
- National Geographic, in an article entitled “Why We Lie”
A Safe Place to Make Mistakes
First…we all lie sometimes (even if we think we don’t!) But many with ADHD develop a habit of cover-ups and lies as they move through childhood as a coping strategy for dealing with the embarrassment of not always being pulled together. Covering up and pleasing the authority figure or peer who is depending upon you ‘feels’ better at the time than telling the truth and experiencing the wrath that may ensue.
The problem, however, is that over time this sets up a weakening of the brain that means that it becomes progressively harder to break the habit. In my own household, I found that it has taken a great deal of work on MY part to create an atmosphere in which my husband felt safe to be honest with me and stop lying. Our years of struggle didn’t help, as he was ‘trained’ to be easily triggered.
Why should I be partially responsible for helping my husband learn that honesty is the best policy? In our case, my husband simply got tired of fighting me…it was easier to ‘smooth things over’ and exit the scene than deal with me. That makes me partially responsible for our situation.
Yep, it’s his lying and he’s responsible for fixing the issue. But I (and you) can make it easier by creating a safe place to make mistakes and live with ADHD.
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Spring 2026 Seminar is open for registration.
Our life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar has helped hundreds of couples 'do better' Starts Mar 25 / 9 Sessions / 8-9:45pm EST
The next live seminar will be in Fall, 2026.
➤ REGISTER NOW - health care and military discounts
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
➤ REGISTER NOW .... explore similar issues and find effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
-
7 Thursdays at 3:00pm EST - Led by Lisa Magel
Jan 29, Feb 5, 12, 19, 26, Mar 5, 12
Registration will open for upcoming support groups on Tuesday, Feb 3rd at 6:00pm EST
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here!
- Office Hours. LIVE Zoom sessions to ask your questions
- Weekly Action Tips. Emails with video coaching & short assignments
- Workshops: Live, expert-led workshops tailored to support your journey
- Book Club. Wisdom and support from ADHD experts and authors
- Community Discussion Forum. Expert-facilitated member discussion forum
- Unlimited Video Replays. Events are recorded for replay
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Register Open) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Opens Feb 3) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - (Registration Opens Feb 3) This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Registration Opens Feb 3) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
What Makes a Good Partner?
ADHD & Marriage News - January 20, 2026
Quote of the Week
“I truly believe that the privilege of a lifetime is being who you are."
- Viola Davis
What Makes a Good Partner?
I agree with Davis – being who you are is great! But…understand that this has ramifications in a relationship. If you feel that it’s important to indulge your hair trigger anger and are regularly violent because you’ve ‘always been that way’, for example, you will have trouble sustaining a relationship. You may be ‘you’ but you will be alone.
There are two versions of this ‘accept me as I am’ that I hear with ADHD couples that don’t work for me. First, there is the ADHD partner who says ‘love me unconditionally and accept me as I am’ while taking little or no control of ADHD symptoms that make the partner’s life completely miserable. Second, there is the non-ADHD partner who feels that controlling behaviors are justified due to chaos, and takes over everything…trampling others. (Yes, non-ADHD partners are going to think I have put that unkindly…but when you overperform in a relationship, this is what you are doing.)
Instead of the “I get to be who I get to be” attitude if you indulge in it, how about looking at what makes a good partner instead? And, if you think that includes things like being respectful, affection, kind or level-headed…then the first place to start is with yourself.
We are all unique, and that’s part of what is great in life. But unique is different from awful or hurtful. Make sure you know the difference.
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE! Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Seminar -
It's NOT TOO LATE: The last day to join the live winter 2026 seminar is January 20th.
-
Use code gift40 at checkout to take $40 off registration.
Our life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar has helped hundreds of couples 'do better'
➤ REGISTER NOW - Listen to recordings to get up to speed, then dive into this 9 session Zoom LIVE seminar. Questions? Contact us.
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
➤ REGISTER NOW - A few spots open:
-
Thursdays at 3:00pm EST - Led by Lisa Magel
7 Thursday afternoons: Jan 22, 29, Feb 5, 12, 19, 26, Mar 5 -
Wednesdays at 2:00pm EST - Led by Lee Crespi
7 Wednesday afternoons: Feb 11, 18, 25, Mar 4, 11, 18, 25
Join a community exploring similar issues, successes & struggles and find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Registration will open for all support groups on Tuesday, Feb 3rd at 6:00pm EST
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here!
-
i2a Foundation Courses - New! - Offering a shared starting point and a steady path forward, these courses bring together the core concepts, tools, and practices that help ADHD-impacted couples move out of distance and reactivity and into improved teamwork and connection. Exclusive to Intent To Action and free for members, join us today for reliable support for your relationship to thrive!
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Last day to register for Winter Session) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
Inside an ADHD Brain
ADHD & Marriage News - January 13, 2026
Quote of the Week
“Unless you’re inside an ADHD brain, it’s hard to fathom how much it dominates your life."
- Linda Roggli
Inside an ADHD Brain
Roggli wouldn’t put it this way, but I will. Non-ADHD partners have no clue how hard it can be to manage an ADHD brain! Here are just a few descriptions from ADHD adults about what it’s like to have that mind:
• Like popcorn popping in my head all the time
• Like having 59 TVs blaring in my head all at once.
• Like having faulty windshield wipers on your car – sometimes you can see clearly, but often it’s a real blur
• Like having the Library of Congress in your head with no card catalogue.
These quotes speak to (in order) the speed, noisiness, inconsistency/obstruction, and lack of order of the ADHD brain. Now take a moment and imagine what it would be like to write a research paper if your brain was filled with TONS of information, only some of which was relevant, and you had to find just the right information in ‘the Library of Congress with no card catalogue!’
The more I work with adults with ADHD, the more I admire their willingness to manage their ADHD brains – creating systems that work for them. And the good news is that research strongly supports the claim that those who really work to optimize their ADHD treatment CAN manage their ADHD brains. But to non-ADHD partners out there – remember that it is about ‘management’ not ‘cure.’ So it takes extra effort and time to be productive.
If you’ve ever wondered why it takes an ADHD partner longer to do the same thing…now you know.
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE! Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Seminar -
starts January 14th.
-
Use code gift40 at checkout to take $40 off registration.
Our life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar has helped hundreds of couples 'do better'
➤ REGISTER NOW - Starts TOMORROW
This 9-session Zoom seminar has helped many couples thrive in healthier, happier relationships. Questions? Contact us. "Thank you for such a life-changing seminar. It was the best and most effective money and time we ever spent." It provides hope, information and the tools you need to move towards a HAPPIER, HEALTHIER & THRIVING RELATIONSHIP.
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
➤ REGISTER NOW - A few spots open:
-
Wednesdays at 2:00pm Eastern Time - Led by Lee Crespi
7 Wednesday afternoons: Feb 11, 18, 25, Mar 4, 11, 18, 25 -
Thursdays at 3:00pm Eastern Time - Led by Lisa Magel
7 Thursday afternoons: Jan 22, 29, Feb 5, 12, 19, 26, Mar 5
Join a community exploring similar issues, learn from each other's successes & struggles and find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here!
-
i2a Foundation Courses - New! These courses bring together the core concepts, tools, and practices that help ADHD-impacted couples move out of distance and reactivity and into improved teamwork and connection. The i2a Foundation Courses offer a shared starting point—and a steady path forward. Exclusive to Intent To Action, and free for members, join us today for reliable support for your relationship to thrive!
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 14th) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
Best Selves
ADHD & Marriage News - January 6, 2026
Quote of the Week
“There is no crime, absolutely none, that connote be condoned when ‘our’ side commits it.”
- George Orwell
Best Selves
Well, I might not agree completely with this statement as I think there are crimes that aren’t ever condonable. But when one is talking about behavior in a relationship, then I think that this statement holds true. Do we not tend to criticize our partner for being angry, curt or hurtful yet ‘understand it’ when we do similar things ourselves?
I certainly fell into this pattern. For years it wasn’t okay for my husband to treat me poorly, but his inconsistent behaviors ‘justified’ my criticisms and anger in return. This kept on until I realized that not only did I not like him very much, but I also didn’t like ME very much, either. It was time to set my own standards – and stick to them!
Partners do best when they conscientiously contribute their ‘best selves’ to their relationship and I challenge all with whom I work to look at their own behavior with an objective eye. Would they like to be with themselves if they were in the same room?
How about you? Are you contributing your ‘best self?” If not, look back to your most important values and ask yourself how you might do better. Your situation will likely improve.
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE! Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Seminar - starts January 14th.
-
Use code gift40 at checkout to take $40 off registration.
Our life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar has helped hundreds of couples 'do better'
➤ REGISTER NOW - Starts January 14th
This 9-session Zoom seminar has helped many couples thrive in healthier, happier relationships. Questions? Contact us. "Thank you for such a life-changing seminar. It was the best and most effective money and time we ever spent." It provides hope, information and the tools you need to move towards a HAPPIER, HEALTHIER & THRIVING RELATIONSHIP.
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
➤ REGISTER NOW - Starting THIS WEEK!!
Understand how ADHD impacts emotional connections, communication, and day-to-day relationship dynamics. Each Zoom session focuses on topics chosen by group members for in-depth exploration and actionable strategies.
Join a community exploring similar issues, learn from each other's successes & struggles and find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation
➤ REGISTER NOW Jan 7th
Free, one-hour webinar — How to Turn Tension into Understanding in ADHD-Impacted Relationships. Learning conversations are structured, compassionate dialogues that replace blame with curiosity and create safety for real connection. Discover practical strategies, examples and tools to apply at home right away! Plus, ask your questions live with an ADHD & Marriage Expert Consultant.
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here!
- i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation - Jan 7th.
-
i2a Foundation Courses - New! These courses bring together the core concepts, tools, and practices that help ADHD-impacted couples move out of distance and reactivity and into improved teamwork and connection. The i2a Foundation Courses offer a shared starting point—and a steady path forward. Exclusive to Intent To Action, and free for members, join us today for reliable support for your relationship to thrive!
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 14th) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open, Starting NOW) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
Unrealistic Expectations
ADHD & Marriage News - December 30, 2025
Quote of the Week
“It’s always helpful to remember that when perfectionism is driving, shame is riding shotgun.”
- Brene Brown, in Rising Strong
Unrealistic Expectations
Satisfaction, happiness, and self-esteem are related to the gap between expectations and reality. The smaller the gap, the higher the levels of happiness and self-esteem are.
This creates a problem for adults with ADHD, because expectations are generally that they will perform just as well as those who aren’t encumbered by ADHD symptoms, simply because they are adults. Though they often do perform well – and even excel - on big picture tasks (think starting a new company) and in high pressure emergency situations (think day trader; emergency room physician) the mundane parts of life can be tough. Forget about perfectionism…ADHD symptoms get in the way of meeting ‘regular’ expectations! Most ADHD adults experience a lot of shame, even if they aren’t talking about it.
Be aware of triggering that shame (shame does not lead to positive responses in most cases!) And, if you are the partner with the ADHD, get to understand the ins and outs of your specific ADHD. “Right size” your expectations to fit where you are in the treatment optimization process. Over time, you can – and should! - learn skills to help you perform reliably. In the meantime, don’t torture yourself with unrealistic expectations.
Talk with your partner about your specific plans, goals and expectations as you set them so you are both on the same page.
Happy New Year! May we continue to support and inspire each other, embrace new opportunities, face challenges with courage, and fill our hearts with love and gratitude.
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE! Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Seminar
Want to do better? ... (who doesn't?!) Our life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar has helped hundreds of couples 'do better'. Don't delay, it starts on January 14th.
No matter where you are in the world.... you can take this 9-session Zoom Seminar. It has helped many, many couples thrive in healthier, happier relationships. Questions? Contact us. "Thank you for such a life-changing seminar. It was the best and most effective money and time we ever spent." It provides hope, information and the tools you need to move towards a HAPPIER, HEALTHIER & THRIVING RELATIONSHIP.
The next live seminar will be in Spring, 2026.
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
➤ REGISTER NOW Starts Jan 5th
Does your partner have ADHD? Each Zoom session focuses on one or two topics chosen by group members for in-depth exploration. Spots fill quickly — 4 sessions are already FULL!
Non-ADHD support groups' objectives:
- Join a community exploring similar issues
- Learn from each other's successes & struggles
- Find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation
➤ REGISTER NOW Jan 7th
Free, one-hour webinar — How to Turn Tension into Understanding in ADHD-Impacted Relationships. Learning conversations are structured, compassionate dialogues that replace blame with curiosity and create safety for real connection. Discover practical strategies, examples and tools to apply at home right away! Plus, ask your questions live with an ADHD & Marriage Expert Consultant.
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing - Subscribe by Dec 31, 2025 to secure the special rate). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here! i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation - Jan 7th.
We are exceedingly excited to announce the i2a Foundation Courses! These courses bring together the core concepts, tools, and practices that help ADHD-impacted couples move out of distance and reactivity and into improved teamwork and connection. The i2a Foundation Courses offer a shared starting point—and a steady path forward. Exclusive to Intent To Action, and free for members, join us today for reliable support for your relationship to thrive!
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 14th) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 5th - Spots fill quickly — 4 sessions are FULL!) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
Do Better
ADHD & Marriage News - December 23, 2025
Quote of the Week
“I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better I do better.”
- Maya Angelou
Do Better
Once you have learned just how much adult ADHD can impact your relationship I think you have actually got two relationships. The ‘old’ one and the ‘new’ one you are building. The old relationship included under-managed or undiagnosed ADHD and all of the symptoms and responses that go with it. You grew to struggle, but you did the best you could do given the information you had – responding in very human and understandable ways to the pressures that ADHD – and responses to ADHD – encouraged.
But the new relationship – the one you’re in once the two of you genuinely start to work on your ADHD-influenced interactions – that one can be so much better! You can be better equipped – with knowledge, strategies, forgiveness, treatment and so much more – and you can do better.
Take each day and make it the best, warmest, most reliable, most patient, happiest day you can….using the strategies you are learning about how to thrive with ADHD. Then string a series together…now that you both ‘know better’ you can and ‘do better.’
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE! Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Seminar
Want to do better? ... (who doesn't?!) Our life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar has helped hundreds of couples 'do better'. Don't delay, it starts in THREE WEEKS on January 14th.
This 9-session Zoom seminar has helped many couples thrive in healthier, happier relationships. Questions? Contact us. "Thank you for such a life-changing seminar. It was the best and most effective money and time we ever spent." It provides hope, information and the tools you need to move towards a HAPPIER, HEALTHIER & THRIVING RELATIONSHIP.
The next live seminar will be in Spring, 2026.
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
➤ REGISTER NOW Starts Jan 5th
Does your partner have ADHD? Each Zoom session focuses on one or two topics chosen by group members for in-depth exploration. Spots fill quickly — 4 sessions are already FULL!
Non-ADHD support groups' objectives:
- Join a community exploring similar issues
- Learn from each other's successes & struggles
- Find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation
➤ REGISTER NOW Jan 7th
Free, one-hour webinar — How to Turn Tension into Understanding in ADHD-Impacted Relationships. Learning conversations are structured, compassionate dialogues that replace blame with curiosity and create safety for real connection. Discover practical strategies, examples and tools to apply at home right away! Plus, ask your questions live with an ADHD & Marriage Expert Consultant.
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing - Subscribe by Dec 31, 2025 to secure the special rate). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here! i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation - Jan 7th.
We are exceedingly excited to announce the i2a Foundation Courses! These courses bring together the core concepts, tools, and practices that help ADHD-impacted couples move out of distance and reactivity and into improved teamwork and connection. The i2a Foundation Courses offer a shared starting point—and a steady path forward. Exclusive to Intent To Action, and free for members, join us today for reliable support for your relationship to thrive!
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 14th) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 5th - Spots fill quickly — 4 sessions are FULL!) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
How Alive Are You?
ADHD & Marriage News - December 16, 2025
Quote of the Week
“It matters not where or how far you travel…but how much alive you are.”
- Henry David Thoreau
How Alive Are You?
One of the things that attracted me to my husband was how much energy he has. He is truly alive – thinking all the time, enjoying his life, open to doing new things, ready to jump!
This sounds like many ADHD adults, and one of the things that saddens me is when the trials and troubles of life start to extinguish their fire. There are lots of ‘good reasons’ this happens, most of which have to do with ‘settling down’ and ‘acting like an adult’ - AKA ‘being more responsible.’ Being RELIABLE makes a good partner, to be sure, but this can be done poorly. Too much attention to being responsible is like putting a wet blanket on your life. If you always choose to do the chore because you must, then days, months, even years pass without the fuel that passions can provide.
Non-ADHD partners – overwhelmed with too much to do, also suffer greatly from becoming ‘too responsible.’ I know I sure did!
The most successful adults – ADHD or not – are those who let some fire and passion into their lives. They are purpose driven and eager. Open to new ideas. Willing to explore. They save at least some time to ‘play’ with things and ideas that are important to them. I’m lucky – my work is a passion. I also ‘play’ with music, bike riding, and life-long learning.
How about you? Do you have enough ‘play’ in your life to feel fulfilled? I’m not advocating all play and no work (as you might well end up out on the street!) but a balance.
As Thoreau asks…how alive are you?
REGISTRATION OPEN - No More Procrastinating:
LIVE! Couples' ADHD Effect In-Depth Seminar
➤ REGISTER NOW Starts Jan 14th
Our life-changing ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar starts January 14th! This 9-session Zoom seminar has helped many couples thrive in healthier, happier relationships. Register Now. Questions? Contact us. "Thank you for such a life-changing seminar. It was the best and most effective money and time we ever spent." It provides hope, information and the tools you need to move towards a HAPPIER, HEALTHIER & THRIVING RELATIONSHIP.
The next live seminar will be in Spring, 2026.
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
➤ REGISTER NOW Starts Jan 5th
Does your partner have ADHD? Each Zoom session focuses on one or two topics chosen by group members for in-depth exploration. Spots fill quickly — 4 sessions are already FULL!
Non-ADHD support groups' objectives:
- Join a community exploring similar issues
- Learn from each other's successes & struggles
- Find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation
➤ REGISTER NOW Jan 7th
Free, one-hour webinar — How to Turn Tension into Understanding in ADHD-Impacted Relationships. Learning conversations are structured, compassionate dialogues that replace blame with curiosity and create safety for real connection. Discover practical strategies, examples and tools to apply at home right away! Plus, ask your questions live with an ADHD & Marriage Expert Consultant.
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing - Subscribe by Dec 31, 2025 to secure the special rate). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here! i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation - Jan 7th.
We are exceedingly excited to announce the i2a Foundation Courses! These courses bring together the core concepts, tools, and practices that help ADHD-impacted couples move out of distance and reactivity and into improved teamwork and connection. The i2a Foundation Courses offer a shared starting point—and a steady path forward. Exclusive to Intent To Action, and free for members, join us today for reliable support for your relationship to thrive!
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 14th) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 5th - Spots fill quickly — 4 sessions are FULL!) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
Meandering Conversations
ADHD & Marriage News - December 9, 2025
Quote of the Week
“Not all those who wander are lost.”
- J.R. R. Tolkien
Meandering Conversations
The ADHD mind wanders…a lot! It comes upon something interesting and off it goes, exploring it! And conversations often meander, too. I had one man with ADHD tell me that he ‘liked to talk about things in the same way that a movie unfolds – with overlapping plot lines.’ His ‘straight-line-from-point-A-to-point-B’ wife was completely fed up!
Having a mind (and conversational style) that meanders takes time. It doesn’t arrive at its landing point in the fastest possible way. Yet wandering is not an indication that the person is broken or doesn’t have a valid point of view. It’s just stylistic. Furthermore, that meandering can bring really interesting ideas…if you only have the patience to follow the journey.
Note to non-ADHD partners: it’s my experience that non-ADHD partners may not understand WHY the ideas brought in by mental exploration and meandering are interesting at the time…in my own case, my own desire to ‘get things done so I could move on’ (i.e. impatience) got in the way of appreciating the twists and turns of my ADHD family members’ minds. It was not until my kids were a bit older and I could start to slow down more that I could enjoy these ‘journeys’ with my family members more.
So here’s the kicker. If you slow down and learn to enjoy the journey simply because your partner is taking you on it, three things can happen: your partner starts to open up to you more often; your partner starts to feel more appreciated and happy; and you actually start to enjoy yourself because you and your partner are sharing more deeply. You become more connected.
What could you start doing to ‘enjoy the journey’ more?
REGISTRATION OPEN:
LIVE Couples' Seminar with Melissa Orlov - The ADHD Effect In-Depth
➤ REGISTER NOW Starts Jan 14th
9 Sessions / Wednesdays, 8:00pm - 9:45pm EST. Melissa's premier seminar has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. It provides hope, information and the tools you need to move towards a HAPPIER, HEALTHIER & THRIVING RELATIONSHIP.
The next live seminar will be in Spring, 2026.
NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups
➤ REGISTER NOW Starts Jan 5th
Does your partner have ADHD? Each Zoom session focuses on one or two topics chosen by group members for in-depth exploration.
Non-ADHD support groups' objectives:
- Join a community exploring similar issues
- Learn from each other's successes & struggles
- Find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation
➤ REGISTER NOW Jan 7th
Free, one-hour webinar — How to Turn Tension into Understanding in ADHD-Impacted Relationships. Learning conversations are structured, compassionate dialogues that replace blame with curiosity and create safety for real connection. Discover practical strategies, examples and tools to apply at home right away! Plus, ask your questions live with an ADHD & Marriage Expert Consultant.
Seminars, Groups:
Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing - Subscribe by Dec 31, 2025 to secure the special rate). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here! i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation - Jan 7th.
Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 14th) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.
The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.
Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 5th) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.
Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.
ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar
Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.
Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.
Free Resources:
- Weekly Marriage Tips email newsletters;
- Free Treatment E-book "How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD";
- A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;
- A large number of blog posts on various topics;
- Referrals for ADHD-Savvy Therapists;
- Chore Score Worksheet;
- Recommended Reading for Couples Impacted by Adult ADHD
- The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Huff Post's top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:
Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
|
|
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! Questions? Contact us |
© 2026 Melissa Orlov |
|
Pages
Upcoming seminars & support groups
Knowledge is the first step to a thriving ADHD relationship. Join our upcoming live couples' seminar to learn what you need to know.
Next one starts on Mar 25, 2026. Sign up Now!
Need a little support? Join one of our small groups non-ADHD partner support groups, led by experts. Spring Groups start on Mar 23, 2026. RSVP Now!
The ADHD Effect on Marriage was listed in Huff Post as a top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
Register for free marriage tips here!
"Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."
Free Treatment E-Book
